This is the reminder that being here on earth with a beating heart must be for something more than earning money miserably in a thankless job, leaving the house for twelve hours to feed the children, running, and pretending to satisfy yourself timidly after the anguish of not making monthly payments, dealing with violence, indifference, or constantly fighting any type of war with life.
For my part, I decided a long time ago that there is a reality that I am not willing to live, I took the attribution of loving so many things that it is difficult for me to separate myself from them, and I built my remedies for emptiness. I allow myself to be calm and happy and think freely about the past. I see the passing of the days, the beauty, the good, and the art of finding myself inspired and complete. It reminds me of the past.
In the past, I could often remember that I could do everything, and lately, I have also been able to do everything, and yet I am not talking about an absolute, about everything, but about what is essential for me.
I have increased my room for maneuver, putting aside my fears. I entered a period without tears, free of tone raises and devoid of sad Sundays. Today I enjoy everything, and I appreciate that everything, and somehow what I think is the best thing reminds me of the past because I lived what I appreciated the most, what I thought was everything and it wasn't, and now from far away finally I feel, and I move for the rest, I enjoy the present, and I appreciate the infinite and that luckily goes far beyond what the past was.
I live moments of immensity so great that silence and contemplation of the details around me is the most coherent response; the answer is also, at least for now, that I am very much with me until the rest is with me too, and that this is how it is almost always, but forever.